1st Saturday

Siaw Hui is right to say that He is the priority of my life. Rather say He is my routine, He has become part of my life.

I didn't realise that I love Him more than i expected.

I would miss Him, be mad at Him till I couldn't breathe.

I miss holding His hands, hugging Him, kissing Him, breathing His breathe with my face close to His. I miss playing the "Where's the remote control game" with Him.

I miss being behind Him on his bike. I know, the person who could hug Him from behind has changed. That privilege is no longer mine, it now belongs to someone else. Just this thought, would send me breathless.

When the train passses by Toa Payoh, my heart will skip a beat. In actual fact, my heart is beating for Him. I cannot go AMK Hub even. We used to watch movies there. In the future, movies will be without Him. I won't eat Go Go Franks and Swensens' Mee Goreng again.

I cannot even bring myself to buy 8days anymore. I will be reminded of him if i do so.

Walked down Orchard Rd with Ying Ying,every corner we turned, I would mention to her that He and I used to.......
Just walking down from 313 Somerset to Taka would send me in tears. I couldn't bring myself to go Far East.
Went to Ion, I have to pretend that the corner of my eye did not see Fred Perry.

I have to learn to travel alone. I have lost my travel partner.

Ying Ying said that I could eat pork now freely...but I still unconsciously picked out all e pork in the congee.

Everyone says this is not going to be easy on me at all. It takes time. I don't know how long I will need.

The only thing I am sure is that He will always hold a place in my heart, Despite what He has done to me, to our relationship.

People around me can't bear to see me cry again. I can only cry in my heart.